Reminiscing.....

Remember the days in high school when you thought that life could never possibly get any better? You have the best friends, and you're so cool, and fashionable, and of course that hottie in your econ class has an equally enormous crush on you! (Me neither, just trying to create an image...)

Recently I've been thinking a lot about the attitudes I had in high school, the friends I made (and promptly lost when I went off to college) the crushes I had, the clothes I wore.... and I wonder how the hell I turned out remotely normal. But maybe that's what high school is like for everyone?

I remember most of all thinking that the people I was friends with in high school would be my friends forever... I always believed that no matter how far away and how much we changed, that we would always all be the best of friends.... Didn't everyone think that? Was I the only one who was horribly mistaken?

Now that I am older and wiser, I can see that when you are 18 years old, you have youthful and idealistic hopes and expectations for the future. You still haven't realized that people can change, and grow apart - even if only separated by 45 miles.

And it makes me sad looking at the select few that I really cared about keeping in touch with, and how I have nothing in common with them anymore other than some silly, childish memories....

And naturally this scares me, as I prepare myself (more emotionally than anything) for the move to LA... leaving my good friends of the last 6 years behind me and relocating nearly 400 miles away.

And there will be new friends, and John's high school friends (how the hell did you pull that off?) who over the course of John and I's relationship have become really good friends of mine as well. And I am excited at the opportunity to spend more time with them and find out what it is that I did wrong in high school that John did right.... and maybe he can help me not make the same mistake this time.

I think I am more mature now (Dear God, I hope so!) and my friends are closer and more valuable than I ever could have imagined having back in high school.... so maybe I will save myself from making that mistake again.

One can only hope.